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5 Reasons I Love Calling In to Book Clubs by Jill Smolinski
  Jill Smolinski is the author of OBJECTS OF MY AFFECTION, THE NEXT THING ON MY LIST and FLOPPED. Her short story "40 Days" appears in the anthology AMERICAN GIRLS ABOUT TOWN, and she has also written nine books on topics ranging from origami to supermodels. She lives in Los Angeles with her son. Visit her at JillSmolinski.com.
Like many writers, I tend to be shy. So when my first novel came out --- and on my web site I said I’d call in to book clubs to join in their discussion if they were reading it --- I did so figuring (perhaps hoping?) no one would take me up on the offer. Two books and hundreds of book club calls later, it turns out that these phone and Skype calls I was so nervous about are now one of my favorite perks of being a published author.
Here’s why:
1. I get to connect with fellow book lovers. That’s why you join a book club, isn’t it --- because you love books? And for the wine and/or desserts? And to get away from the kids for a few hours? Okay, there are plenty of reasons you might join a book club, but surely one of them is a love of reading. I’m a writer because I’m a reader … books, magazines, backs of cereal boxes, whatever… so it’s pure pleasure for me to spend time with other people who share that passion.
2. Book clubs give me insight into my own books. I sometimes wonder if Herman Melville had called in to book clubs, and someone asked him, “So, this whale, it was a symbol of Ahab’s struggle against authority, right?” if it might have caused him to stop and ponder exactly why he wrote what he did. It happens to me all the time when I talk to readers. I suppose it’s because as I’m writing, I know what message I want to convey, but I don’t exactly plan word by word how I’m going to do it. Book club readers tend to point out to me what were often subconscious writing choices. For example, in my new novel, OBJECTS OF MY AFFECTION, it wasn’t until a reader said that she appreciated a particular parallel between two of the characters that I even realized it was there --- and that I’d meant for it to be there.
3. It’s a chance to revisit my characters. When I type the words “The End” on my manuscript (and I really do --- it’s so satisfying!) the thrill of having finished is mixed with a certain mourning over having to say goodbye to the characters I’ve created. After all, I’ve spent literally years with them, day in and day out. By chatting about them with book clubs, it’s as if I’m at a reunion (and without all the awkward run-ins with old boyfriends).
4. Reader feedback has made me a better writer. Whether it’s sharing with me parts of my books that they enjoyed --- or asking me about what they didn’t “get” or telling me how they’d hoped the plot would have veered a different way --- readers give me valuable feedback. After all, I’m not writing to myself here, I’m writing to tell a story to someone. I’m always open to learning how to be better at it.
5. It’s fun to see how creative book clubs can be. OBJECTS OF MY AFFECTION is about a personal organizer who is working with a reclusive hoarder to get her to clear out her home. The hostess for one book club I called served snacks in a giant, piled-up mishmash of unmatched bowls, plates and cups --- brilliant! For my last book, THE NEXT THING ON MY LIST (which was about a woman completing a bucket list for  someone who’d died before she could finish it,) I was astounded at how many clever ways groups made the theme part of their meeting --- whether by bringing their own bucket lists to share, or playing out some of the items on my character’s list, such as wearing sexy shoes. (This is a far cry from the book club I belong to, where we’re proud if most of us have even read the book.)
I am thrilled to have the chance to be an honorary member of so many book clubs and meet so many fun, bright and interesting people. And the offer still stands: If your book club is reading one of my novels, I’d be glad to call or Skype in to join your meeting. Details are at JillSmolinski.com.
Jana Riess on Meeting Erik Larson
 Jana Riess, the author of FLUNKING SAINTHOOD and a longtime friend of TheBookReportNetwork.com, lives in Cincinnati and attended Erik Larson’s event this past Saturday afternoon at the Cincinnati Public Library. He is on tour for IN THE GARDEN OF BEASTS: Love, Terror, and An American Family in Hitler's Berlin, which is just out in paperback. We asked her to share her thoughts on this event in the following Q&A.
Bookreporter.com: Have you read all of Larson's books? If not, which have you read and do you have a particular favorite?
Janna Riess: I had only read IN THE GARDEN OF BEASTS, and my husband (sitting next to me) had only read THE DEVIL IN THE WHITE CITY. Hearing Erik Larson speak made me want to read his other books as well. I think I’ll start with DEVIL. I’m also really interested in ISAAC’S STORM, which is a popular history of a devastating hurricane that hit Texas in 1900.
BRC: How large was the audience and what was the mix of people like? Can you share a few anecdotes from his talk?
JR: The librarian told my husband that they had set up 350 chairs, and it was a completely full house. I’d say that most of the people were middle-aged and older, with some younger people mixed in.
Since I’m an author, I’m generally fascinated to hear anecdotes about other writers’ early careers. One story Larson told was about a book signing he did years ago where the bookstore owner had baked some chocolate chip cookies, I guess to make the whole event seem more homey. After an hour and a half of sitting at the table and having shoppers show no interest – no one would meet his eye – a woman walked up enthusiastically to the signing table with a smile on her face. His spirits lifted and he thought, “Finally! Someone is going to buy a book!” And then she asked, “How much for the cookies?”
Another story was from a C-SPAN book event Larson did in Texas for ISAAC’S STORM, so I’m guessing this was over a decade ago. One of the questions came from his daughter Lauren, age 9, who was traveling with him as a special vacation. She asked, “Dad, do you make up stuff for your books?” She had read the book on the plane and had some doubts about its veracity. That story got a good laugh.
One other memorable story was about a signing he did in Cincinnati some years ago. By this time he was a very successful writer, and there were a lot of people in line for the signing. He said he always looks to see who is the last person in line because that is the person who wants to linger and ask him nutty questions. And she looked kind of intense and crazy. Sure enough, when she got to the table she leaned forward and whispered, “My husband is trying to kill me.” And he just took it in stride and replied, “Who would you like me to make this book out to?”
BRC: Were there any interesting questions from the audience?
JR: Some of the questions I didn’t quite understand because I hadn’t read any of his books besides IN THE GARDEN OF BEASTS. One was about a documentary film in which someone had claimed that some human bones did not belong to the person Larson had claimed, a theory he said most reputable historians found preposterous. I’m sorry I don’t have more context on that; I’m not even sure which book they were discussing.
Someone else asked him which of his six books was his favorite, and issued the caveat that it wasn’t fair for him to answer the question with the likes of, “My books are like my children. I don’t have a favorite.” But then that was exactly how he answered the question --- they are all his favorites for different reasons, etc. He did admit in the end that IN THE GARDEN OF BEASTS was probably his favorite right now, but that may be because he tends to like the most recent book best.
BRC: Were there any hints as to what he is working on now?
JR: No, he completely shut that question down. He said he does not discuss future projects until they’re finished. However, he did concede that the New York Times had just leaked this info last month and that we could find out the basic parameters of the next project if we Googled it. (He also asked for us to wait until we got home to look it up on our smart phones!) So here is what the Times said on April 13:
Just as the publishing industry has finished marking the 100th anniversary of the Titanic’s sinking with dozens of related books, at least one publisher is looking ahead to another anniversary: the sinking of the British ocean liner Lusitania by a German U-boat during World War I. Crown Publishers, part of Random House, said on Friday that it had acquired a nonfiction book by Erik Larson, the author of “The Devil in the White City,” that will “offer a fresh take” on the sinking.
The attack, on May 7, 1915, killed nearly 1,200 people, including more than 100 Americans. It fueled anti-German sentiment in the United States, although America did not enter the war for another two years. The book, tentatively titled “Sea of Secrets,” will be published in 2015. Mr. Larson’s latest book, “In the Garden of Beasts,” was released in May 2011 and has sold more than 900,000 copies.
I am excited to see how this book on the Lusitania turns out. He discussed one of his favorite works ofpopular history, A NIGHT TO REMEMBER, a classic narrative about the sinking of the Titanic. So I can see why he would be interested in this other sinking just three years later, especially since it was a major factor in turning the tide of U.S sentiment toward changing its isolationist stance and entering the war. I’m sure he’ll do a masterful job with it.
Men are also from Venus
  Devan Sipher has been writing about weddings for The New York Times’ "Vows" column for more than five years. He received a master of fine arts degree from the Tisch School of the Arts at New York University. He lives in New York City, and is still single. Here he talks about the inspiration for his new novel, The Wedding Beat, which follows Gavin Greene, a hopeless romantic --- and lonely, single guy --- who writes the wedding column in a popular newspaper.
That’s what I’ve learned from five years of writing the Vows wedding column at The New York Times. Sure, a few thousand years’ history of raping and pillaging suggests otherwise. But beneath the stubble and the Sportscenter addiction, most men are as confused, vulnerable and romantic as women when it comes to falling in love. They just don’t like talking about it.
Did I mention I’m also one of those men?
Yes, I’m a guy. A single, Jewish guy over 40 who writes about weddings. (It’s killing my parents.) But here’s the secret: I enjoy it. I get paid to be curious. And no topic is off limits. My interviews are sometimes closer to therapy than journalism (and more than one professional therapist has suggested I could have a future in their line of work). But my goal isn’t to analyze, it’s to accurately convey the lives of two people, the love they share, and the obstacles they overcame to sustain that love. I think of my articles as profiles in romantic courage.
However, working 80-hour weeks, including weekends, isn't the way to sustain my own love life. There’s a thin line between being a hardworking journalist at one of the best newspapers on the planet and being a lonely guy spending his Saturday nights at other people’s weddings.
Everything changed while covering a wedding in December 2008. I had a Christmas party I was looking forward to attending (lots of single women), but ended up with a wedding on the same night. Fortunately, it was a very sweet and straightforward story. So I was planning on high-tailing it out of the reception after the first dance.
The problem was that there were speeches. Lots of speeches. I kept checking my watch as it got later and later. But here’s the thing: they were really good speeches. Funny, touching, and they illuminated aspects of the bridal couple I didn't know about. I finally left the reception after midnight and jumped into a taxi. The wedding was on the Lower East Side of Manhattan and the Christmas party was on the Upper West Side. In between was the parking lot known as New York holiday traffic on a Saturday night. After 20 minutes I had gone less than a half dozen blocks. I got out of the taxi and walked home.
That’s when it occurred to me that my situation would be much more amusing to someone who wasn’t living it. The Wedding Beat was born. I thought it would offer me the opportunity to share what I had learned from talking to so many brides and grooms. (I was hoping I had learned something.) It would also allow me to put to rest the idea that only women thrive on romance. I heard far too many stories from guys who had sweated it out with a diamond in their pocket on a mountaintop to subscribe to that notion.
And anyone who thinks only women are emotional wrecks after breakups hasn’t been out with a drunk male friend who’s been dumped by his girlfriend. I had one friend who was inconsolable for months. And when I say inconsolable, I mean it was all he talked about. Why did she leave? What could he do to get her back? Where would he ever find anyone as perfect as she was? (Perfect except for the dumping him part.) I think he assumed that I would be particularly tolerant of his emotional outpourings, because of what I did for a living. But I felt like I gave at the office, so to speak. Meanwhile, within six months he met the woman he would eventually marry. That’s the inspiring thing I’ve learned writing The Wedding Beat --- love can happen to anyone at any moment.
Eileen Goudge on Marriage
  Bestselling author Eileen Goudge has always been fascinated with discovering people's motives. In her new novel, The Replacement Wife, she asks a difficult question --- what would you do if you were told you had only six months to live? --- and weaves it into a story of love, family, and fate. Here, she reflects on the experience that inspired her to write this story and shares some of her philosophy about marriage, life, and love.
A near-death experience is a funny thing. Some see the light. I did what I always do in a stressful situation: made a to-do list as though I was packing for a trip. My husband Sandy jokes that I’d orchestrate my own funeral from my coffin if I could! And speaking of my dear husband, can you guess what was at the top of my list? All I could think about as I lay in my hospital bed was: What will happen to him if I die? Would he marry again? And if so, whom? (Hopefully someone who’d keep my cupboards organized and who could bake a decent pie!)
Flash forward ten years. As you can see, I’m still in the land of the living (far as I know, you can’t blog from the Great Beyond). But the experience sparked my imagination, and that spark fired the plot for my newest novel, The Replacement Wife. What, I wondered, if a wife who learns she has six months to live were a professional matchmaker? Would she try to ensure that her husband would find happiness again after she’s gone? By that, I mean would she actually set out to find him his next wife? It’s a thorny question and not one that’s easily answered, as I discovered through the multiple drafts I wrote in order to make the story plausible. Why would a loving wife do such a thing? (Even if she’s made it clear she doesn’t mean for him to sleep with the “other woman,” at least not while she’s around.) How could she bear watching them growing closer when most women can’t stand even the thought of their husband with another woman?
As my matchmaker heroine, Camille Harte, discovers, it is a road with many twists and turns and a totally unexpected outcome. Suffice it to say, it doesn’t work out as she envisions. It shines a light on issues in her own marriage that she and her husband had ignored. The introduction of the “other woman” threatens to rip asunder a life that seems all the more dear as she feels it slip away.
I imagine this topic that will spark some lively discussions among reading groups! Every marriage, like every death experience (oops, don’t mean to put the two in the same sentence), is different. What one person would see as the greatest sacrifice a wife could make, another might see as cold and uncaring. What would you do under those circumstances? Could you imagine going to such lengths? And, perhaps more importantly, what would your husband do? Would he balk at the proposition . . . or see it, as my fictional husband eventually does, as an opportunity to bring comfort to his dying wife? Is it possible to stand by your spouse, while being open to the possibility that you might love again?
Claire Bidwell Smith: On Choosing a Non-Linear Structure for My Memoir
 Claire Bidwell Smith lives in Los Angeles with her husband Greg Boose and their daughter. Claire is an experienced therapist specializing in grief and the author of THE RULES OF INHERITANCE, her new memoir about the death of both her parents when she was a young adult.
This book was reviewed on Bookreporter.com and is one of our Bookreporter.com Bets On picks. In this post, Claire discusses her decision to take a nonlinear approach to her memoir, and she also shares her own experiences with the five Stages of Grief.
Originally I intended THE RULES OF INHERITANCE to be more of an instructional book about how to move through the grief journey. I’d been working in hospice as a bereavement counselor for four years when I decided to write this book, and the most common thing I encountered during my tenure was confusion over Elisabeth Kubler Ross’s five stages of grief: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance.  I thought it might be helpful if I broke the stages down to show how fluid and dynamic they really are. When I began to do this though, I realized that the best way to illustrate this concept might be if I used my own story as an example. My parents were both diagnosed with cancer within months of each other when I was 14. My mother died when I was 18 and my father when I was 25.
The years leading up to, and following, both of their deaths were terribly lonely and confusing. I didn’t know anyone my age who had been through anything similar and I had no guideposts to help me find relief from all the grief I was experiencing. It took me many years to figure it out on my own.
When I did, I realized I had a lot to share with others who were traversing a similar journey, and I sat down to write this book. I broke my story down into Elisabeth Kubler-Ross’s five stages of grief, as outlined in her book ON GRIEF AND GRIEVING, and I began to earnestly examine my own path along these concepts. In the first section of Denial, I revisited my mother’s death when I was 18, followed by the dual cancer diagnosis my parents received when I was fourteen, and then the return of my father’s illness when I was 25.
The rest of the book moves back and forth in time like this, revealing how the five stages of grief can come and go throughout the grieving process. One of the biggest misconceptions is that you need to move through them in perfect order, or that you have to experience the weight of each one equally. Some people may never experience all five stages, and even those who do will find that they come and go as needed to move through mourning.
As a writer, I found this structure to be particularly effective in writing a memoir. I think one of the struggles with narrative nonfiction, and with memoir in particular, is figuring out what to leave out of the story. So often superfluous information and events work their way into the story simply as a means of getting from point A to point B. Using the structure I did, I was able to avoid this conundrum completely, the end result being a distillation of what was most important to the arc of the story.
Also in the end, I believe I was able to effectively demonstrate the message that there is no right way to grieve. There is no perfect formula or magic recipe for complete healing. No matter how universal the act of losing someone may be, we all have to create our own path to the other side of grief.
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